Are you on the fence? Many times in my own life I’ve sat on the fence much longer than I should have, meaning I sat literally and figuratively in the middle of two decisions ~ going nowhere! It might be a job or a relationship and your mind’s conversation goes back and forth between should I stay or should I go and yet you never seem to get clarity one way or another. How about the times that you’ve made a decision but haven’t jumped into it wholeheartedly and you’re still holding onto wishing the other decision was true? Perhaps you’ve said that you’re going to work on your marriage and yet you throw the “D” (divorce) word out there during times of struggle. Or maybe you’ve made a decision and act like you’re going with it and yet at every bump there’s something like an “I told you so”- a clear sign that you didn’t quite jump in as wholeheartedly as you thought. It’s like waiting for the tipping point… waiting for that one final thing that will make it so unbearable or so significantly changed that you’ll decide I’m done, I’m ready!
Well, let it be said… sitting on the fence gets us nowhere and often eats away at our self-esteem, not to mention the relationships that are often entangled with our decision. Furthermore, sitting with indecision actually prevents us from getting the information we need to make a decision.
Ready to get off the fence? Ready to fully commit to a decision so that you can have a real experience of what’s possible rather than the many ‘what if’s’ that run through your head? Here are some steps to move you from indecision to commitment:
Clarify your options and weigh out the pros and cons as well as the consequences of all of them. Then choose one that based on this moment, with your best information at this time feels like the best one. Are you willing to live with the consequences? Do this not as a way of saying this is it, but rather as a way of saying let my commitment to this decision show me the next step. Let the reality of my full commitment inform what comes next based on what I learn and observe about being firmly planted on this side of the fence.
Ask yourself? Am I waiting for someone else to say, do or be different before I make a decision? If so, watch out. We all know that we can’t change other people and when we’re waiting for someone else to make the decision, we’re giving our lives away. Instead, take the wheel and some ownership for what it is YOU want.
What will you need to attend to in order to give this your best shot? Who is impacted by your decision? What is it that you need to tell them so that they know your plan? Are there requests you need to make of others to support you? Are their boundaries that you need to put in place for yourself?
Are you ready to get off the fence and jump wholeheartedly into your decision? It will no doubt be scary, might even feel hard but don’t forget that you wouldn’t even be considering the change if what you were currently doing was working for you.
“After making a true decision, even a tough one, most of us feel a tremendous amount of relief. We’ve finally gotten off the fence! And we all know how great it feels to have a clear, unquestioned objective.” ~ Anthony Robbins
Coaching is a great, proactive and supportive way to move from indecision to wholeheartedness. If you’ve been on the fence for a while and are ready to get off the fence, give us a call!